Here's the listing for our future home in St. Louis (& a good reason you should come visit us):
Finally! You can go ahead and skip all those other obviously haunted places you were thinking about renting. This badboy is guaranteed free of any ghosts, leprechauns (too often overlooked) and infamously prank-hungry angels. Plus it has a balcony. AND a deck. You can pretty much sit outside in whatever direction you want. No directional constraints!
So you're a fan of stained glass and all wood floors? Good, we have those too. Also, a fenced backyard, full basement and enough space to have a small 90's rave (please note that the lease strongly prohibits all 90's related activity).
Do your clothes complain of being thrashed around in the washing machine or suffer public humiliation at the local laundromat? Well, save all your Sacagaweas and your long underwear's pride - there's a front loading high efficiency washer and dryer residing in the basement along with other useful items like a hot water heater and furnace.
Warning: Do NOT run the central air while blazing up the fire place. They're complete opposites and literally hate each other. If you do accidentally have them going at the same time, please use the awesome vintage kitchen to clean up the resulting created weather system. And by the way, when I say "vintage" I don't mean "vintagely out of date and crappy". I mean, awesome original metal cabinetry along with modern amenities like disposal, dishwasher and the like.
Feel free to brag to your friends about your new neighborhood too. Not only does Tower Grove South make it easy to get to places you want to be (South Grand restaurants, THE Tower Grove Park, Morganford strip, etc...), but it makes other neighborhoods look like the bad parts of Canada. Never been to Canada? Good. Lots of bad parts.
If you aren't asking yourself why you wouldn't want to live in this place, you obviously aren't looking for a beautiful three bedroom home to share with your family, roommates or political allies. If you are, you'd probably want some deets.... Ok then:
Type: 3 Bedroom / 1 bath single family home.
Rent: $1,500/month (conveniently divisible by 3. wink.)
Security Deposit: $1,000
Availability: Sept 1st
Underrated Saved By The Bell Character: Tori
Please email with any questions or to schedule a formal tour (that's where we show you the house in evening wear). We do regular tours too.
Also will consider Rent to Own or straight up sell if you feel like receiving high fives.
Comments
Jess, I want to see your hear smiling :)